At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Randomize
