he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
