Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
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