Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
