Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
