she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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