I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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