I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
