haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
