Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
