just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize