i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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