Sry I called you an 8
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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