i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
pop tarts are not kleenex
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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