Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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