The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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