If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
