I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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