Me too!
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
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my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
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btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
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