Texts From Last Night

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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.

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  (614): Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash. http://tfl.nu/fkwm
  Replies (8) Good night (2903) Bad night (610)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa

  (281): View more from Texas

  what did you steal

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.

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  (832): We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa (281): what did you steal (832): frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list. http://tfl.nu/gckp
  Replies (10) Good night (2288) Bad night (976)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?

  (636): View more from Missouri

  our generation is not ready to get married

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  (314): Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"? (636): our generation is not ready to get married http://tfl.nu/klk9
  Replies (49) Good night (7037) Bad night (2685)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE

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  (401): Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE http://tfl.nu/8fti
  Replies (4) Good night (3588) Bad night (1007)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.

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  (253): I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore. http://tfl.nu/1haa
  Replies (15) Good night (1619) Bad night (3794)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.

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  (202): Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes. http://tfl.nu/57eb
  Replies (50) Good night (2559) Bad night (5639)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.

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  (479): Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students. http://tfl.nu/ij14
  Replies (11) Good night (1039) Bad night (3267)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Champagne is a vitamin, right?

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  (904): Champagne is a vitamin, right? http://tfl.nu/gkox
  Replies (4) Good night (2384) Bad night (1096)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.

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  (727): don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday. http://tfl.nu/jjm9
  Replies (7) Good night (2015) Bad night (793)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.

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  (636): So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN. http://tfl.nu/pnvk
  Replies (3) Good night (1320) Bad night (542)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  "Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."

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  (920): "Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see." http://tfl.nu/5bgq
  Replies (2) Good night (646) Bad night (420)
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  (619): View more from California

  I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.

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  (619): I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday. http://tfl.nu/3yb4
  Replies (3) Good night (404) Bad night (282)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.

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  (518): Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong. http://tfl.nu/bkiv
  Replies (2) Good night (592) Bad night (212)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.

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  (613): We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor. http://tfl.nu/xkiw
  Replies (0) Good night (428) Bad night (215)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How

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  (757): Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How http://tfl.nu/ht88
  Replies (0) Good night (374) Bad night (123)

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