Texts From Last Night

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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  in pain and im wearing pink underwear

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  so?

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i dont own pink underwear

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  (609): in pain and im wearing pink underwear (908): so? (609): i dont own pink underwear http://tfl.nu/78xa
  Replies (1) Good night (1305) Bad night (806)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you

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  (404): Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head (770): Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you http://tfl.nu/ibzk
  Replies (20) Good night (3910) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  As in blowjob or cannibalism?

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.

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  (515): John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance. (1-515): As in blowjob or cannibalism? (515): I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal. http://tfl.nu/r3de
  Replies (71) Good night (4059) Bad night (1455)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  my life trainwreck boards at 9:30

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  (858): my life trainwreck boards at 9:30 http://tfl.nu/fi8y
  Replies (4) Good night (3185) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore

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  (732): My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore http://tfl.nu/2pmj
  Replies (38) Good night (5188) Bad night (1598)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship

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  (803): I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship http://tfl.nu/p7or
  Replies (15) Good night (3737) Bad night (1742)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.

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  (256): Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier. http://tfl.nu/oxri
  Replies (5) Good night (2313) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.

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  (480): You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home. (602): Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul. http://tfl.nu/qvbw
  Replies (10) Good night (2703) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.

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  (856): Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass. http://tfl.nu/qahd
  Replies (4) Good night (1670) Bad night (520)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.

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  (312): Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows. http://tfl.nu/kvi1
  Replies (2) Good night (1721) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants

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  (479): fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants http://tfl.nu/pys2
  Replies (8) Good night (987) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch

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  (559): Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch http://tfl.nu/0nmy
  Replies (7) Good night (638) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?

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  (217): Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices? http://tfl.nu/ss4x
  Replies (0) Good night (639) Bad night (208)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets

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  (602): My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets http://tfl.nu/nnmb
  Replies (3) Good night (445) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate

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  (908): I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate http://tfl.nu/fdgz
  Replies (0) Good night (329) Bad night (234)

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