I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
