did you get engaged???
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
