I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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