He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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