Its about making memories worth repressing
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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