ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
You need a sexual gate keeper
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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