i just wanna soil my oats bro
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize