What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
