I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
