My brain says no but my pants say off.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
