Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(917): View more from New York City

I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(917): I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer. http://tfl.nu/px5x

Replies (1) Good night (669) Bad night (942)
Favorite
(253): View more from Washington

My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(253): My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support. http://tfl.nu/g29g

Replies (4) Good night (720) Bad night (2560)
Favorite
(401): View more from Rhode Island

let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.

(401): View more from Rhode Island

oh how i love working at summer camp.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(401): let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week. (401): oh how i love working at summer camp. http://tfl.nu/jjrc

Replies (36) Good night (3190) Bad night (453)
Favorite
(204): View more from Manitoba

all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(204): all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future. http://tfl.nu/ob1b

Replies (4) Good night (3884) Bad night (746)
Favorite
(615): View more from Tennessee

just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(615): just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here. http://tfl.nu/npdf

Replies (19) Good night (852) Bad night (4553)
Favorite
(205): View more from Alabama

I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(205): I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers. http://tfl.nu/jlqp

Replies (21) Good night (7020) Bad night (1334)
Favorite
(703): View more from Virginia

We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.

(540): View more from Virginia

You guys make me sad

(703): View more from Virginia

You misspelled jealous there

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(703): We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone. (540): You guys make me sad (703): You misspelled jealous there http://tfl.nu/wtst

Replies (23) Good night (11669) Bad night (1337)
Favorite
(559): View more from California

can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(559): can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock. http://tfl.nu/805r

Replies (16) Good night (5806) Bad night (908)
Favorite
(419): View more from Ohio

You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(419): You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours http://tfl.nu/i7uw

Replies (2) Good night (2043) Bad night (647)
Favorite
(217): View more from Illinois

Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(217): Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not. http://tfl.nu/3f1l

Replies (4) Good night (1791) Bad night (543)
Favorite
(313): View more from Michigan

Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.

(1-313): View more from Michigan

That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(313): Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning. (1-313): That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls. http://tfl.nu/sn09

Replies (7) Good night (503) Bad night (1393)
Favorite
(812): View more from Indiana

Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(812): Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome. http://tfl.nu/9uj2

Replies (9) Good night (1463) Bad night (493)
Favorite
(540): View more from Virginia

We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(540): We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment. http://tfl.nu/ze3a

Replies (3) Good night (1517) Bad night (297)
Favorite
(316): View more from Kansas

She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(316): She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone. http://tfl.nu/tcs7

Replies (13) Good night (665) Bad night (1857)
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too. http://tfl.nu/dtev

Replies (8) Good night (477) Bad night (187)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: