Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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