whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize