dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
