It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
