Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
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we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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