Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
