Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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