And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
