he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
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the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
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the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
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