dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
