My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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