K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize