Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize