Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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