we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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