Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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