i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
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