She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize