Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
you win again, gameday.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Randomize
