went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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