This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize