week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
